Why 40 Days For Peace?

    A memorable quote from the BBC series, 'Call of the Midwife' was part of the inspiration for my upcoming journey: "You just keep living. Until you are alive again." But, more than that, it was travel that I have always done during difficult times in my life. And, if you've read my earlier Facebook posts, you know what's been happening...'My husband died and I had Ass cancer'.

     Case in point:1981: My first husband (yep, a very stupid move on my part) left me after 13 months of 'marriage' and I took off solo across country in my Chevy Chevette...a very popular car in its day...for five weeks. I quit my job as an assistant bank manager and headed out. From that I found out that his leaving was the best thing that happened to me...and from that I fell in love with Jim and lived happily ever after...
     1983: I was a mortgage banker when the mortgage rates were 20% and dramatically dropped to 13% and EVERYBODY refinanced! I couldn't take it! I moved to the Caribbean with Jim and became a cocktail waitress, wearing a one piece swimsuit, with wrap and high heels...best 2 years of my life! And, those years with Jim helped us to develop an amazing relationship.
     1989: Marguerite was born with Hydrocephalus and the doctors said something like, "Just take her home and love her because we aren't really certain of her future." With those encouraging words Jim and I packed up 3-year-old Madeleine, and 3 MONTH old Marguerite and drove west for a 3 week camping trip...seriously, we camped at Custer State Park on the last day it was opened. We cried and prayed and didn't even consider that we might need to run to the hospital if Marguerite's shunt became clogged. Those weeks bonded our family and strengthened our faith. Now at 26, Marguerite is one of the strongest young women I know. 
     2013:After completing my breast cancer treatments in May of 2011, going through a burglary of our house, and a very stressful first year as a middle school counselor, I took off solo back east to visit my family and my amazing friends in Virginia. I surrounded myself with those people who gave me strength and encouragement to continue. And after that I began a most amazing job with DCC as a high school counselor.
     2014: I took my family: Madeleine, her husband, Jesse, Marguerite, and Mackenzie back to the Caribbean for Christmas 2014 to spread Jim's ashes in Drake's passage where he had always wanted to be after he died. Our family cried, prayed, sang, and drank LOTS of rum, and came back stronger and more united than ever. 
     2015: I have a clean bill of health from my anal cancer and will reached the 5 year mark on my breast cancer in May. Of course, I will have to be checked every 3 months for the next 2 years for my anal cancer, but for now I'm claiming victory. Jim was to retire this June, 2015 and our plans were to travel to Vietnam where he served as a Marine in 1967/68. He said it was the most beautiful country he'd ever seen. I'm not heading to Vietnam, but to 3 other countries of which he and I had connections.Italy: seriously, who wouldn't want to go to Italy? We never did, but it was always on our list.
     Scotland: the land where his family hails...Peterhead, Scotland to be exact. His mom came to the USA as a young girl.
Paris: just for a night because the one time we were there we didn't have time to visit the Musee d'Orsay and he promised he would take me back one day.
     Ireland: my mom's family, the Cofiell's, have roots there and I've always loved the magical  and spiritual side of Ireland (oh, the Guinness, too). I'm taking my youngest daughter, Mackenzie, who just graduated from college, and has been separated from the four of us since Jim died. She needs to heal...we all do and I wish Madeleine, Marguerite, and Jesse could come, but let's be realistic $$$$!
     Grief is hard...that's an understatement. We all need to heal--- between the cancer and Jim's death we have all been rather in shell shock, numb, lost. I pray for my family at home and hope that this time for them will be healing as well (after all they don't have to put up with me!)
     We will be traveling for 6 weeks...we have backpacks...good shoes...good cameras. What else do we need? I've entered into this adventure through much prayer and I know that the Lord will go before us and we will heal, as I've always done when I've traveled after life becomes unbearable.  
    Oh, Yeah...the 40 days part...so many references to 40 days or 40 years in scripture...and those 40 days/years references always ended with the Lord's direction...can't wait to see what direction the Lord has for me and for Mackenzie.


Peace!